ANYWAY. Time for business. Post-y business.

So, today, I was totally being lazy in class and checking twitter (boring tutorial is boring), and there was this huge kerfufel (ker-fuf-el , basically a way of saying “silly-ish argument”) about how Volley being removed has made huntering basically the worst thing.

(ADDITION: Before we begin, I’d like to say, I don’t want to get in an argument with any of you, and I respect your opinions (or your right to one, at least). However, this is my turn, and I feel the need to tell you how stupid this whole thing is.

Also, I’m not really ‘for’ or ‘against’ AoE. Would be willing to trade the existance of all AoE spells apart from prettyful explosion (which I’d not be using for AoE anyway, because, well, it kinda sucks), for nothing. Nada. Zip.

ALSO: This post doesn’t really give any solutions to the Volley issuse, but I can probably think of a few. However, I’m not qualified to talk about them.

END ADDITION)

Now, I don’t play a hunt-, wait.

Okay, now that is out of the way, I’m going to say a bunch of stuff now, mainly focusing on how you are wrong and how AoEs are boring and also lame.

FIRST POINT: AoEing is about the most boring thing, and is kinda why this expansion has sucked a fat one.

I mean, really, on the whole, it’s been okay, but man, AoE is bor—–ing. It also doesn’t require any skill or fun. Also blizzard is a frost spell and people get all pissy when I cast Arcane Explosion (probably because it sucks/ed) .

Blizzard are trying to fix this by scaling down AoEs, but they are also trying to bring back CC a bit, so they can’t only have 2 man pulls (as Blizzard becomes worthwhile with 3 or more targets), because that’s boring as fuck. THEREFORE THEY DON’T REALLY WANT EVERY CLASS HAVING AN AOE ATTACK.

SECOND POINT: There are a bunch of people being all like “Now I can’t find stealthers when flare is on CD”. Okay. Fair enough. You know how I do that? BY DYING AFTER BEING AMBUSHED OR ATTACKED BY A STIFF BREEZE.

Seriously, if that is a real reason, then seriously I am going to have to go headdesk now.

POINT THE THIRD: AoE Grinding is the best way to do solo shit.

Two things.

1. Fuck
2. You

Solo AoE grinding is lame and I don’t even think there is a word to describe how lame it is. I’m talking like FFFFFFF- levels of lame here.

I’m going to talk about the past now. Back, before the stupid halls of LOLNAX, LOLDUAR, or ICELOL, back, in the storms of Netherstorm… s.

I was a proud(ish) member of the Scryers, a bunch of Blood Elves that were being all chilled and shit up in Shattrath City, but they totally hated these other Blood Elves, who were led by the King Prince of the Cosmos Blood Elves, but were being total dicks and stuff.

So I’m up there, killing these guys for their books and there shiny signets (which were probably made out of drugs for these chillaxed elves to get chillaxed on or something), and my normal fight pattern was something like this, I guess:

• Pyroblast
• Fireball (Perhaps Frostbolt, once)
• Fireball
• Fireblast

EXCITEMENT. Occasionally, if I accidentally bit off more than a single dude, I would cast the mighty PoM-Pyro, which would be really useful.

AND DEN there was this other mage that was there occasionally (He was Frost (also a Chinese Farmer, but that didn’t bother me so much)) his battles would be more like this:

• Run around gathering like 10-20 dudes and somehow not dying.
• Frost Nova
• Blizzard

THAT’S, that’s…. boooorrriinnnng. Boring as fuck.

ANOTHER EXAMPLE. Paladins, Argent Tourney. Fuckers.

• Fly In
• Gather all the guys
• Consecrate
• Divine Storm
• Etc.

BORING (also like totally unfair).

So, that rant being ranted. I feel that I’ve run out of things to say. So yeah. Hope I didn’t offend you too much.

Firstly, I totally did a good deed today. /brag Gnomeaggedon, earlier this morning, posted a wonderful post about how he killed a whole bunch of Hordies, and finished it off by asking the ganker for an [Enchanted Broom], the Blood Elf Argent Tournament pet.

Now, I, being the probably the most sympathetic PvPer ever to grace the blog-o-sphere (Pfft, yeah right), was totally like “He wants a Broom? I can totally get him one (or like 4) of those!”. So I told him I’d get him one. And I did.

Now, I know I totally said one good deed deserves another, and while I did get a mechanopeep out of this, that’s not the only thing. You see, this is the 50th post of Arcane Envoy. It might of taken ages, but it totally happened.

So yeah. This post should of been about my 5 favorite 5-mans, but I’ve been slow in getting pictures for all of them. Soon, I promise.

I can’t remember what triggered this, but I felt the need to put in my $0.02 about the ‘great’ JRPG/WRPG debate.

The main argument against JRPGs seems to be ‘They are stagnant, blah blah blah”. SO WHAT? The plot works, and the gameplay is fun. Ya’know? If you don’t like it, then whatever, don’t play them.

On the other hand, (my) argument against WRPGs is that they are stagnant too. ‘Moral Choices’ are boring as fuck. (Especially when the only choice is being ‘THE MOST GOOD’ or being ‘THE WORST THING EVER’.

Also, WRPGs don’t actually exist anymore. There is exactly 1 recent, blockbuster-ish RPG that has come out of a Western company in recent memory.

DARGON AGE.

And it kinda sucked a little. For everything they did right (the dialogue trees, character customization) THEY DECIDED TO TAKE OUT OF THE SEQUEL.

WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT FUCK BIOWARE YOU FUCKING DUMB IDIOTS.

And before you say ‘Mass Effect’! or ‘Fallout 3′! or ‘Oblivion’! or ‘World of Warcraft’!

None of those count.

ME is less of an RPG than it is a shooter, and the sequel is just a sub-par shooter with a large number of boring characters, one genuinely attractive (perhaps not physically, but whatever) character (who would only romance dudes, proving she was more lame than I thought), and about as much RPG as a Coke Zero has sugar.

Fallout 3 was in real time, or in VATS, and then spent mainly in real time.

Oblivion was a watered down Morrowind, with more action and less RPG.

WoW is a m-m-or-ph-guh. (Or MMORPG). RPGs are for a single dude (read: player; not wanting to get attacked by female gamers here) to enjoy on his lonesome. Or something. Apart from that though, it’s good.

That being said, they’re still good games. Just not really RPGs anymore.

Here’s the thing. As much as I care about my privacy, and I care about the precedent it is setting for the future of gaming,  I don’t care.

I’m as afraid as anyone else about creepy stalkers and shit (I have enough trouble talking to people already, I don’t need any of that anxiety), and I do really care about how the negative stigma attached to gamers will affect my ability to get a job in a few years time, but for now, I can’t properly express my feelings on the issue.

To put it simply, (which I am known to do only when I really want to get a point across) RealID is going in a really bad direction, and I hope that this ‘social gaming’ fad remains as optional as it has been in the past.

Basically to do this, you need to run into the opposing faction’s main cities and capture all of their flames (I’m not sure if you need to get Silvermoon or Exodar’s flames, but I will assume that you do (because I am a completionist)).

Therefore, I have developed this mini-guide to…

Being a Sneaky Fucker. Stealing the Flames of the Alliance & Horde.

Now, this is not actually all that difficult. Honest. To begin with I’m going to do the Cities of the Alliance (I have actually done these, and can be 100% sure that they more or less work). I suggest going Exodar -> Darnassus -> Stormwind -> Ironforge.

To begin, haul your ass to just outside Auberdine (in Darkshore). Then make your way to the far end of the dock (the western end). This boat goes to the Draenei starter zones, and you should be able to get over to Azuremist Isle without any incidents.

To get into the Exodar, take the side entrance, which is just to your left as you get off the dock. Run down the ramp, and then north into the Crystal Hall. The bonfire is near the middle of the area, and takes 1 second to steal (you will find an item in your bags, not an immediate quest popup).

Once you have the flame, take the boat back to Auberdine and take the northern dock to Rut’theran Village, convienently, the Darnassus flame is here, so grab it and scram, if you’re really quick you might make it back on the boat before it leaves.

Back at Auberdine once more, take the southern boat to Stormwind Harbor. From here you need to run up the ramps, along The Park side of the canal, across to the Mage District, and make your way over to the flame, which is outside the Stockades.

From here, quickly jump into the canals and swim for your life to the Cathedral Square dock thing (near the Dwarven District), mount up (you can do this in the water) and ride to the Deeprun tram, which will take you to Ironforge.

Finally, run out of the tram (mounting as soon as you exit it) north to the Hall of Explorers. This is the hardest flame to get, as there are usually about 1,000,000 Alliance douches there waiting to kill you. As long as you get the flame, just spirit rez and hearth out. Congratulations on getting your achievement!

Now to do the Horde Cities

Before I begin, remember that the quests start from an item that is deposited in your bags when you use the flames. As long as you’ve got the item, don’t worry about the actual quest while you’re in the enemy cities.

First off, I’d start in Silvermoon, not for any real reason, apart from the lack of flow to other cities that it has. In Silvermoon you need to get to the Court of the Sun. To do this, you should run north, and through Murder Row. The bonfire is just beyond this.

Then make your way to Undercity. This is probably the easiest one of all the cities, as it is not even inside the city proper. Just run in the front door, and leave. No biggie.

Take the Zeppelin to Orgrimmar, and then run to the western edge of Durotar, and across the river into the Barrens. Follow the river north and go in the side entrance of Orgrimmar. Follow the path along into the Valley of Wisdom, and get the flame. This is by far the hardest of all of the flames, but if you’re quick, it should be rather simple.

Finally, go to the western Zeppelin tower out the front of Org. There are two Zeps that depart from here. One to NR, and one to Thunder Bluff. The best part of this is, that it deposits you right on top of the flame. Too easy. Hearth out and collect your prize.

I was going to do a joke today, but then I realized that I am my own joke! I didn’t have the forward planning to actually think of something good, so I give you….

Wait for it….

NOTHING!

No highly amusing anecdotes about how I made myself violently sick while playing as frost (actually, that was a fairly funny story), or about that one time I had to do some stuff, like single handedly do a whole bunch of stuff in SW for some holiday achievement, or something (that was actually rather lame), or about that one time I killed some alien dude with a wrench and some rockets (woah, wrong game).

This is of course, as you might of guessed, a RUSE. Or, a JOKE. Or, something else. A lie, perhaps?

I’ve spent the last week playing remakes of the greatest game of my childhood. Pokemon Soul Silver. A shining beacon of old school-ness in a sea of kinda dull DS-based Pokemon games. I mean, sure, there are better RPGs, but they are even more stupidly difficult (yeah, I didn’t remember how tough the pokemans could be either) and are for the PS2 (read they’re Persona 3/4) and this one has Eevee, or to be more specific, this one has FLAREON.

In honor of this momentous occasion, I have deleted my toons, and rolled a hunter, called Red, and have made him a BEAST POKEMON MASTER! With his adorable and strong lynx FLAREON!

…

nani desu ka ?

anata wa watashi wo shinji te i nai desu ka ?

Okay, that wasn’t fair. But really. I totally have. And stuff. It’s rad. I love having a pet, and traps and stuff.

Gotcha. :p